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Thursday 11 February 2010

Really Interesting Stuff - Ways to Climb the Career Ladder

The first rule for career develoment is develop an appreciation for delegation
The second rule for career development is when the boss is away its time to play
The third rule for career development is learn to waste your resources on failure then you wont feel so bad if you succeed and get more to do
The fourth rule for career development is only work quickly if you're being watched
The fifth rule for career development is never, never ever have a tidy desk
The sixth rule to career development is to develop the ability to dodge all responsibility - never admit to anything and don't leave a paper trail 
The seventh rule for career development is no favors under any circumstances
The eighth rule for career development is expend most of your energy and thought evading work and cover your ass
The ninth rule for career development is continually seek new technologies to reduce your workloads
The tenth rule is never cover anyones shift. Even if they die overnight its up to them to make their own arragements
The eleventh rule for career development is become as invisible as  possible - develop total anonymity -  they can't fire a specter
The twelfth rule of career development is keep your sociable sick day offs in the pub off facebook
The thirteenth rule to career development is always put off today what you can surreptitiously unload to a colleague tomorrow
The fouteenth rule for career development is aquire a range of occupational therapy items such as neck brace, crutches, arm slings etc.  Use these at peak activity times for greater effectivness and sympathy.  They will appreciate you all the more for being such a trooper and turning up in such a plight.
The fifteenth rule to career development is condition your employer to expect less, keep them hungry for more and slowly let them starve
The sixteenth rule to career development is make yourself permanantly un-available to information seekers - dont put yourself in the firing line
The seventeenth rule for career development is learn to look busy when you're not - develop that stressed worn out look that you see developing in your more expendable hard working colleagues as they crack under the strain of too much work and not enough people to deal with it
The eighteenth rule for career development is take the credit for all new ideas you wont have any yourself so steal someone elses
The nineteenth rule to career development is spend as much time as you can in the loo without being labelled a pervert
The twentieth rule for career development is click the bottom tabs on your computer - this is the quickest way to hide your asda shopping list

I hope this has been helpful to aid your climb up the career ladder